Sunday, 27 January 2013

if i were a boy...

i can still remember the times when i used to talk like a boy...it was all like... 

mai padh raha tha.... mumma mai ja rha hu.

it was just a way to show my happiness and how awesome i felt....how much cared...and may be a lil spoiled...
 i would just copy my brother...the way he talks...the way he walks... 

that time i thought it was really just a way to show affection...

but now when i look back at those times... i know i just wanted to be like him...so that i would be loved always...may be i will also stay with my family for my whole life...  
may be i just wanted to be a boy...

there was no discrimination...of any kind in my family... and i am thankful to God...for choosing such an amazing place...a beautiful bunch of people... so loving...caring... understanding... so much more :)

i guess family is always like this for everyone..because of the love we share,.. the care... the WE thing...


still throughout our childhood + adolescent we have heard so much about this gender discrimination thing...thanx to media...and the people around us.

 sometimes i wonder what would have happened if my father was one of that kind... being the second daughter i wouldn't have even seen this world...
should i be thankful to him?? or his parents(my grand parents)...????  their guides(teachers)??? or god???

my father for being such a wonderful sport, my grand parents for being such an amazing parents and human beings...or God... for choosing all of them for me :P


may be at times i still wish i was a boy... 

if i were a boy... i would have done everything that i always wanted to...going out wherever and whenever my heart says... making new friends...without even considering anything... 
spending all my money on stupidest of the gadgets... and almost no prob to anyone...
having sisters to love me unconditionally...
not supposed to work my ass off... even when on holiday...or visiting relatives...
or even going out with any of friends...

it would have been wonderful...stepping outside home...no matter what time it is.. 
not worried about the way people looking at you... 
not seeing that worried eyes... when i leave home each day...
not hearing that scared hello when staying away from home.

dancing when i feel like... 
creating a creative mess in my room.
pasting the dumbest of posters on my room's door.
wearing the same socks three days in a row...and still being proud of it. (lolz)
 :D
being proud if people call me playboy (haha)

so so so much...(things which are so damn important that only a gal knows )





but whenever i look at my parents...
the way they look at me...
when they smile on my achievements...
the way they tell me they are so proud of me...
the trust they have in me...
the way i understand even the simplest of their insecurities...their fears.. their pains
i feel so good :)


people say we gals are so emotional... like crying babies always...

but you know what i am proud of myself... 
i know i would have been a wonderful boy...
but i am even much much much better HUMAN-BEING being a gal :)



If I were a boy
I think I could understandHow life is for a gal so, I swear I'd have been a better man

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